Story behind my Crown

What is the story behind your hair? Welcome back kings and queens! Today I’ll be telling you the tale of my hair.

I think it’s interesting because it has been a transition from being just accepting to being really PROUD!

As far back as I can remember, I have always loved the wiry texture of my 4C hair. I mean it was soft when it was wet, smooth when moisturized and stretched long when dried and braided. Sounds good right? I know (lol). But why was I just accepting rather than proudly boasting my crown?

Well I did, however, I would do this out loud and then quietly ponder on what I claimed to be so proud of. A kinky head of hair that took extra care; strong strands that defied gravity and needed to be tied down overnight to maintain curls; hair that drank moisturizers as if it were a desert and sometimes an Afro which stood out like a halo. Those are the characteristics I would identify and subsequently think about. In another context I may have simply saw the good in all of that but, living in a society where most of the girls had their hair relaxed as early as 12 years old, some earlier, I felt too different.

If it wasn’t relaxed hair, everybody used a flat iron or blow dryer until their hair was straight and void of any kinks or coils.

My mother blow dried my hair too but only until it was dried half way through so you know, I had my kinks always. Then again, unlike most of the girls with straightened hair rocking ponytails, I had some of the tightest braids. I mean that in a good way, my braids and cornrows were always on point! That’s when I felt proudest because the same persons who would often say “why your mother don’t cream (relax) your hair?” or “isn’t your hair hard to manage?”, would then say “your hair is so neat” and “my hair could never stay fresh for so long!” I would relish in these comments and walk with my head held high and smile the brightest smiles. Yet once their marvel of my naturality had dwindled, they’d go back to said questions and I to my self-assessment.

One occurrence which stands out even today is a day back when I was in high school, my mother washed and styled my hair in what I thought was an okay hairdo like the one in the image below.

Black-Kids-Braided-Styles — Source: Wedding Academy Creative

I enjoyed having my hair that way, I woke up in the morning energized because the night before, I didn’t have to ensure my head wrap stayed on while I slept. So I was at school having a good day only to have a schoolmate of mine ask “why didn’t you comb your hair?” I told her my hair was combed and inquired what she meant to say. She continued, “I would never leave my house like that” with a snicker erupting from the group of girls accompanying her. I responded “I like it just the way it is and is my hair so it shouldn’t bother you” after which I walked a way. I could still hear her giggling with her goons but I felt too annoyed to even understand what she was insinuating. In hindsight, I realized she was saying my plaits or pigtails as they may be called were a preliminary hairstyle and not a finished product. I should have never left my house like that. Silly.

Even though I dismissed comments like those, I found myself experimenting with the flat iron and hair dyes as I got older, just trying to see what my hair would look like in different styles.

Chellece 20160831_111912 — Back in 2014 when I had purple streaks.

I wanted to show others that my hair was not just kinks and coils, it could be so many things, ironically, as a result of these same kinks and coils. Somewhere in my mind though, I never thought that my crown was less than, I just wanted people to see and accept that it was versatile and there is and should be no shame in wearing it as is. Where I found myself shying was in the fact that no one around me was willing to wear their hair like mine, I believe if I had that support, I would have always been, publicly and privately satisfied with my hair. The styles I ended up trying unfortunately caused more bad than good and I had to do a complete 360º to get back to healthy hair.

Today, that feeling is non-existent, I am the proudest about my crown, my halo, my nimbus of strong, jet black hair. I sport my plaits when I want, my afro and puffs are signature styles I can most likely be seen on any given day. Bantu knots

20190227_232654 — My Bantu knots in their glory.

are a specialty which I leave for special occasions or when I’m feeling really patient, not because they take awhile to do but because I enjoy taking my time to do them properly.

Buying hair products are now a guilty pleasure of mine; moisturizers, masques, deep conditioners and protectants are my favorite. Hair dyes and excessive heat haven’t been a part of my style kit and I am not missing a thing.

I take pride in offering information to others because I believe hair care is super duper, extra important! People see your face and hair before they see anything else and whether short, long, kinky, curly or straight, your hair is your crown and it should always be in pristine condition.

Fun fact I love seeing lace wigs and so I had to know all there was to know about them.

I also love seeing men with full heads of hair and glistening beards so I had to get in those too. Now I am a knowledgeable hair fanatic continuously learning and offering all there is to know about hair and hair care.